Hey, Jude, no apology necessary. We don't care!
By Beth Teitell
Tuesday, July 19, 2005

You know what drives me nuts? When stars broadcast their personal problems and then scold the public for being so nosy.

Latest celebrity hypocrite: Jude Law.

Yesterday, he publicly apologizes to his fiancee Sienna Miller for cheating on her with one of his children's nannies - and then asks us to ``respect'' the couple's privacy.

I'm happy to oblige, but Jude, here's a hint for you: The next time you fall from grace, say you're sorry to Sienna privately - not through the British Press Association. And leave us out of it, OK?

This is quickly becoming the summer of too much information. At this point, I'm dying to respect Jude's privacy - and that of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, and Britney Spears' bump.

Perhaps I'm being too harsh with Jude. If you read his apology, you'll see that he, too, is a victim - albeit of himself, or maybe the media.

``Following the reports in today's papers,'' he said, ``I just want to say I am deeply ashamed and upset that I've hurt Sienna and the people most close to us.''

Following the reports in today's papers.

See, it's the newspaper coverage that made things so difficult, not the fact that he seduced Daisy Wright while he was filming ``All the Kings Men'' in New Orleans.

I wonder how the apology came to be public, anyway. Did Sienna demand it? OK, mister wandering hands, I want you to get your publicist on the phone right now and have them craft a statement of regret for you. And make it good.

The publicity firm that represents Miller told the Associated Press the 23-year-old actress had no comment on Law's statement, but my guess is that she might not have wanted the whole world to know. I base this assumption on polling many women I know who say they don't like the civilian version of the public apology. Namely, the expensive floral bouquet that is sent to work the day after a fight.

``All day people walk by and say, `Looks like someone did something wrong,' '' a woman who recently received post-spat flowers reported. ``And you just get angry (at your SO) all over again.''

As for Jude and Sienna, they're reportedly in ``crisis talks'' over their future, which means we, their public, need to give them time to heal. Until they pose for a gushing photo spread in People or US Weekly, that is.

Then, they'll need us to respect their stardom.