Pop goes the bubble, here come the vultures
By Beth Teitell
Thursday, June 2, 2005

Is it selfish to be happy that there's a bubble in the housing market?

When it bursts, after all, a lot of people - family people - might end up on the street.

And yet, a certain person I know, who will remain nameless, is pretty psyched.

Do I need to mention she's a renter?

``It's going to be like a big pinata,'' she cackled, rubbing her hands together after Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan used the word ``froth'' to describe the housing market.

``And when it pops, we'll be there to pick up the goodies.''

Condos, single-families, triple-deckers, gorgeous Victorians, ahhhh! They'll all be hers someday.

``It's like when you hear the elderly person in the (more desirable) apartment next door coughing,'' she said, ``and you start packing your boxes.''

I looked at her, and, for the first time, I saw her for what she was: an economic vulture.

She was delighted with my assessment. ``Yes! It's the `what's in it for me?' way of life,'' she said, letting me in on a few of her other dreams.

``I'm hoping that the hybrid/electric car takes off. Not that I care about the environment, but think of the incredible sale prices for gas-guzzling cars. Somewhere out there, a Porsche Boxster is waiting for a markdown.''

``Good for you,'' I said, recommending she go onto one of those anonymous confession blog sites. ``Not everyone would admit to that.''

She continued: ``And every year I wait for the sign that the Hamptons are `over.' When P. Diddy throws his White Party, and no one A-list comes, that's when the bargain beach rental has my name on it.''

Do I need to tell you that she was ``thrilled'' to read about the competition heating up for the iPod. Why? Because that inevitably will lead to iPod prices lowering. ``Maybe the pretty little case covers will be free,'' she said.

She paused for a moment, and I thought she was about to at least pretend to have more of a conscience, but no.

``I think it's in the Bible or something,'' she concluded, `` `Good things come to those who wait' - and watch the market.''