I've seen the future, and I'm scared. Why? Because the future can see me.

The next wave of cell phones is equipped with imbedded digital cameras that let you take pictures and then e-mail them instantly. Little Brother is here, and he's holding a Sanyo handset.

The wireless companies are positioning the phones as yet another way to keep in touch with loved ones and have fun when you're out and about, but consider this scenario:

You're supposed to be at work, but you're not in the mood, so you tell your boss you're going to see a client. Suspicious, he calls your cell. Seeing his number on your caller ID, you answer the phone, but before even saying ``hello,'' you pretend to be finishing up a business conversation. ``Let me just run some numbers on that,'' you say with your mouth slightly away from the phone, and then, putting the phone to your chin, you greet the caller, who just happens to be, oh, your boss.

Sure the person in the dressing room next to you at the Gap, or in line behind you at Dunkin' Donuts, thinks you're nuts, but so what? The guy who signs your paycheck has been reassured.

But once these new ``vision-enabled'' phones become the standard, that little dodge won't be possible. Or it will become a lot harder. A number of years ago there was a lot of talk about video phones for the home. At the time I recall being frightened that callers (OK, it was my mother I was worried about) would see my messy house in the background, and any pleasantries would become impossible. ``Beth, what's that on the floor behind you?'' Or, ``I thought you were going to move the couch under the window and put the chairs along the wall.'' Or, ``Where's the vase I gave you? When I visited you had it on the table in the foyer, but I don't see it now.''

Back then, I looked into having an artist create dummy backgrounds, which I'd pop up for different callers. Hey, if the big wigs on the Sunday morning talk shows can pose in front of fake Capitol domes or bookshelves filled with legal tomes, why can't I, I thought. Luckily, something killed the video phone, and we could all rest easy. For a while, at least. Now the threat is back, only it's worse, because with a mobile phone, you'll have to carry a whole library of backgrounds.

Actually, to be honest, it's not just the background that's the problem. It's the foreground, too. Who wants to let every schmo on the other end of the line know that you're growing out a really bad haircut, or that yet another wrinkle is thriving on your forehead?

And, according to an article on Slate.com, a major problem exacerbated by the video phone is so-called ``drunk dialing.''

``Cell-phone owners prone to what's known as the drunk dial now have a whole new way to embarrass themselves. For besotted late-night callers still learning to handle unlimited minutes responsibly, this is enabling technology. Not only will the rest of us have to listen to your rambling five-minute voice mails, now we'll have to look at you, too.''

Of course, you could install a blackout screen, but like the ``private number'' that shows up on caller ID, it makes a person wonder.

Then again, sometimes wondering is better than knowing.